Thursday, April 20, 2006

Love with a key

If I were editor of Vogue magazine my mantra would be "Fashion Follows Fringe". This seasons' "new black" always seems two steps behind the chosen garb of whoever is edgy and slightly unusual - witness geek chic, gypsy style and frumps'-favourite boho. I guess it gets harder to find untapped seams of fresh creativity, judging by Cartier's latest jewellery collection.

This, lovers, is the Cartier Love bracelet - a band of gold fastened by a tiny, ornamental screwdriver onto the wrist of your comely wife or obedient mistress. Pictured below it is a polished stainless steel slave collar, available from Bondage Collars.com (NSFW), purveyors of fine BDSM equipment. It fits neatly around the neck of your slave and unlocks with, you guessed it, a tiny screwdriver.

Issues of ownership and control aside, in some ways Bondage Collars' finest is better value than its H. Samuel counterpart. For a start it's made-to-measure so that you (or, more accurately, your slave) can wear it 24/7. It also costs significantly less - undercutting Cartier by at least $2400, that leaves you plenty to buy all the NSFW riding crops, handcuffs and (very much NSFW) throat funnels your heart desires.

Where one fashionista goes, the other houses follow. That said, I look forward to measuring my partner for a Swarovski crystal chastity sheath (you guessed it, NSFW) and leaving my aunt a clitoral clip underneath the Christmas tree.

4 Comments:

At 1:42 pm, Blogger Adrian said...

This is the Chris we know and are slightly afraid of. And love too.

 
At 5:33 pm, Blogger Chris said...

Just for you I've tackled the thorny subject of child molestation.

 
At 10:41 pm, Blogger Gareth said...

Those throat funnel reviews are the most disgusting things I have ever read.

 
At 8:39 pm, Blogger Chris said...

Oh lord, yes, they are. Even the model doesn't look all that impressed, despite it supposedly being a "sexy fetish" item. Perhaps the photographer poured a can of cold beans down the funnel just before taking the picture.

 

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